The Godhead had so much love inside it's community that it overflowed into creation and into us, whether we are believers or not. So full of Love in fact, that despite the fact that creation turned away, Love still overflowed.
There is a lot of controversy about the consumerism of the Christmas season in the Christian communities across the nation. Rightly so, it is easier and easier each year to loose sight of the real meaning of Christmas. So let me take you inside my head as I stroll the hallways of the mall decked out with holiday sales and as I dash off here and there to get everything done.
I am overjoyed as I walk the mall, Don is too, as we shop for Christmas. We realize that have been given the greatest gift of all - that Love is still in the Trinity and that that love overflows into our lives, and thankfully in the same way, the lives of many of those around us. We give - and we are so happy and grateful to give - in remembrance of that gift.
I know that as I walk the mall, I think about what these people on my list mean to me and what I think they would like. The gifts I purchase are not simply empty items on the list they've given me, but they are things that I have seen and thought of them. Out of this, my love for them over flows and is seen, hopefully. It is the idea that I thought of them as I purchased and gave them that gift.
I do that because I believe as Christ hung dying on the cross and purchased our gift of everlasting life, that is what he thought of.
I have friends that are relatively relentless about their disgust over commercialism during December. I have friends that are frustrated that they are no longer wished a 'Merry Christmas'. I have friends that probably refuse to give gifts on Christmas day. I fit into some of those categories but I think that in the protest of the traditions (both pagan and not) they also loose sight of the opportunity to give. We have a great opportunity that the world has presented us with. This is the season of giving, no matter what we call it. As Christians, let us talk openly with those around us about that tradition, the tradition of giving.
And just to be transparent, Don and I save all year to give during this season and throughout the year, not including the tithe that we give weekly. We also spend less than 10% of that on giving gifts to ourselves.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Almost? ...Not Yet?
I'm down to my last two exams. The first of the remaining is at 3:10 and the second at 6:00.
I always get to exams, the last one to study for in particular, and think or evaluate what my best really is. I get to that last one I have to study for and I get about half way through the material and I think, "I'm tired, exhausted, very little of this is sinking in, I gave up caring about two hours ago, and yet I have so much more to do" What is my best? Is it really that point of exhaustion? ...Should it be?
My stress comes from the fact that I get the exam back and find out how I did and regardless of whether or not it is what I expected to do, I always wonder if I could have done better (of course, being significantly more rested at that point, I usually conclude that I could have). There is nothing left that I can do at that point. I am forced into contentedness.
I've felt this way enough for it to influence my present behavior (yes, we did talk about this at some point in the semester, I can't remember if it was information on the midterm or the final or even what class it really was) but I now push myself more than I ever have before. I can do more papers, I can proof them one more time, I can do all the reading for all the classes (approximately 4500 for my four classes), I can get those papers graded on length to the maximum even tho its not that much more than if I come just a bit short, I can do... push... stay up later, wake up earlier, do just a little bit more... Then it will be my best.
I wish I could find out what my best is. Then I would know how far I have to go in order to get there. Not that I would settle, I don't care how far away my best is, just so I know. I hate seeing an 88 and wondering if a 89 or 90 would have been my best. If that is the case, then I didn't do as much as God had called me to do, I came short. ...again. I was almost. ...But not quite. Jesus meets us where I am...did I make it to that point? These things haunt me. Some days, yes, they keep me up at night...laying in bed awake, I wonder, 'Should I be reading, proofing, studying...' I take Sunday off to rest and my mind races about the load I have to carry for that week.
And it's not like I'm taking all that many classes. On the average week, I do have time to spend with family and friends - both on the weekends and during the week. I am able to go and have coffee with my mom, shopping for Christmas (I am nearly done at the moment), and I have time to fill in and do random acts of kindness and take the weekend off to go to Chicago. I just also wonder, constantly during the last few weeks of the semester, if the best that I am doing at this exact moment in time, is truly the best I am able to do. And deeper yet, if it is the best act of worship I can give God in my human, defaulted, and depraved state. If it is not, I fear I do not know what it is.
Oh, that paper that I ended up double spacing instead of single spacing, I got a 92 on it. Looking back I think I'm satisfied and am happy with the grade because I know I was exhausted at the end. I was however, hoping for a 95. The intensity of my exhaustion is currently the definition I have of whether or not I did my best.
I always get to exams, the last one to study for in particular, and think or evaluate what my best really is. I get to that last one I have to study for and I get about half way through the material and I think, "I'm tired, exhausted, very little of this is sinking in, I gave up caring about two hours ago, and yet I have so much more to do" What is my best? Is it really that point of exhaustion? ...Should it be?
My stress comes from the fact that I get the exam back and find out how I did and regardless of whether or not it is what I expected to do, I always wonder if I could have done better (of course, being significantly more rested at that point, I usually conclude that I could have). There is nothing left that I can do at that point. I am forced into contentedness.
I've felt this way enough for it to influence my present behavior (yes, we did talk about this at some point in the semester, I can't remember if it was information on the midterm or the final or even what class it really was) but I now push myself more than I ever have before. I can do more papers, I can proof them one more time, I can do all the reading for all the classes (approximately 4500 for my four classes), I can get those papers graded on length to the maximum even tho its not that much more than if I come just a bit short, I can do... push... stay up later, wake up earlier, do just a little bit more... Then it will be my best.
I wish I could find out what my best is. Then I would know how far I have to go in order to get there. Not that I would settle, I don't care how far away my best is, just so I know. I hate seeing an 88 and wondering if a 89 or 90 would have been my best. If that is the case, then I didn't do as much as God had called me to do, I came short. ...again. I was almost. ...But not quite. Jesus meets us where I am...did I make it to that point? These things haunt me. Some days, yes, they keep me up at night...laying in bed awake, I wonder, 'Should I be reading, proofing, studying...' I take Sunday off to rest and my mind races about the load I have to carry for that week.
And it's not like I'm taking all that many classes. On the average week, I do have time to spend with family and friends - both on the weekends and during the week. I am able to go and have coffee with my mom, shopping for Christmas (I am nearly done at the moment), and I have time to fill in and do random acts of kindness and take the weekend off to go to Chicago. I just also wonder, constantly during the last few weeks of the semester, if the best that I am doing at this exact moment in time, is truly the best I am able to do. And deeper yet, if it is the best act of worship I can give God in my human, defaulted, and depraved state. If it is not, I fear I do not know what it is.
Oh, that paper that I ended up double spacing instead of single spacing, I got a 92 on it. Looking back I think I'm satisfied and am happy with the grade because I know I was exhausted at the end. I was however, hoping for a 95. The intensity of my exhaustion is currently the definition I have of whether or not I did my best.
Monday, November 30, 2009
The End is in Sight!!
Praise the Lord! One paper, 5 weekly reading assignments, and 4 final exams to go! Pretty excited about that!
In the 11 days leading up to Thanksgiving Break, I wrote 10 papers, 1 presentation, did 2 or 3 reading assignments (enough not to be behind) and updated all of my study guides for my finals. No, Aunt Ev, I am not wonder-woman, just a very dedicated, die-hard, never going to get behind grad student. Oh yeah, I also had an interview last week, squeezed in at the last minute. I got the job/practicum/internship. Praise the Lord, still on track to graduate December 2010.
So that Bone-Headed Move of the Year post: I'm down to 12 pages double spaced, one more run-through proofing job to do and though it will not be down to 10 pages, it will be acceptable.
Starting that last paper tomorrow...was supposed to do it today but I decided to clear the schedule in terms of reading assignments so that I could focus the rest of the week on it...no more reading assignments till next week.
Okay, thanks for all the wonderful comments, keep them coming!
In the 11 days leading up to Thanksgiving Break, I wrote 10 papers, 1 presentation, did 2 or 3 reading assignments (enough not to be behind) and updated all of my study guides for my finals. No, Aunt Ev, I am not wonder-woman, just a very dedicated, die-hard, never going to get behind grad student. Oh yeah, I also had an interview last week, squeezed in at the last minute. I got the job/practicum/internship. Praise the Lord, still on track to graduate December 2010.
So that Bone-Headed Move of the Year post: I'm down to 12 pages double spaced, one more run-through proofing job to do and though it will not be down to 10 pages, it will be acceptable.
Starting that last paper tomorrow...was supposed to do it today but I decided to clear the schedule in terms of reading assignments so that I could focus the rest of the week on it...no more reading assignments till next week.
Okay, thanks for all the wonderful comments, keep them coming!
Monday, November 23, 2009
Bone-Headed move of the Year
So I wrote this wonderful 10 page (single spaced) paper all yesterday. I am pretty proud of it (it's just over 19 pages double spaced, not quite the longest one I've ever written). I think did fairly well on it - still have to proof it - but over all I like what I had to say and I'm pretty proud of wrapping it all up in a nice, neat 10 page bundle.
Found out today that this pretty, fairly well written 10 page, single spaced, yet to be proofed paper, needs to be a pretty, fairly well written, 10 page double spaced, yet to be proofed paper.
Anyone up for a bottle of wine?
Genius.
...Absolute genius.
Found out today that this pretty, fairly well written 10 page, single spaced, yet to be proofed paper, needs to be a pretty, fairly well written, 10 page double spaced, yet to be proofed paper.
Anyone up for a bottle of wine?
Genius.
...Absolute genius.
Howdy
I haven't blogged for a while. Obvious statement I know. If you've seen my facebook, you know why. I am writing everything but this blog. So here I am, in class, updating my blog. Here's life...
I hate theology. I'm sure it's not the context, it could partially be the prof...
I'm buried in work. In the past 11 days I've written 9 papers, 3 weekly reading assignments and I have 2 papers, 1 presentation, 1 interview, 8 weekly reading assignments, and 4 finals to do in the next 25 days.
Next forseeable break from homework (like more than putting it aside to rest): July or August potentially.
I'm struggling... Ironically not to get everything done, I'm pretty sure at this point that it will get done. But I've actually been struggling for quite a while. I think I'm getting to the bottom of it though, but then again, I'm not real sure.
Well, back to Wittmer and Theology... Thanks for reading.
I hate theology. I'm sure it's not the context, it could partially be the prof...
I'm buried in work. In the past 11 days I've written 9 papers, 3 weekly reading assignments and I have 2 papers, 1 presentation, 1 interview, 8 weekly reading assignments, and 4 finals to do in the next 25 days.
Next forseeable break from homework (like more than putting it aside to rest): July or August potentially.
I'm struggling... Ironically not to get everything done, I'm pretty sure at this point that it will get done. But I've actually been struggling for quite a while. I think I'm getting to the bottom of it though, but then again, I'm not real sure.
Well, back to Wittmer and Theology... Thanks for reading.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Robbed of Intellectual Info
The one draining thing about school is the constant taxation on my intellectual info. Now mind you, I don't have a problem giving information out (writing papers, journals, criticisms, stuff about my life, etc...) because it is part of school, in particular Counseling. But really, sometimes I just feel like there are certain professors I have that just tear it out of me in ways that sort of feel like a thief running through my house taking whatever they please.
Really people... Is it that hard to be slightly more polite and gracious about taking these things that I hold so dear?
Thank you.
Really people... Is it that hard to be slightly more polite and gracious about taking these things that I hold so dear?
Thank you.
Wasting Tuition
We have this thing at GRTS called e-portfolio where they mark your progress (as an institution, see how they are doing) and you can also send that on to prospective employers/grad schools in order to...well, do what they do.
We have a mini-lecture about this SEVERAL times during various classes and new student orientation. It costs me $96.15 per class session so why are they repeating themselves over and over? I want my money back.
We also had this thing in as part of program introduction that teaches us how to research in the library. Okay really? We're in graduate school. We probably didn't get this far by not researching. I think we all know. Those who haven't been in school for 15 or so years, well, there are very visible reference people in the library that show us how to do things and are very available to us for help. I would like my money back for that.
It's week nine of the semester, nine weeks ago summer ended. So why are we still having internet/wireless connection problems? What ever you did over the summer Techies, how could it take you more than nine weeks to fix it? I would like my Technology Fee to be returned to me also.
I'm tired of my money being wasted: the government, my apartment people, school. Really people, I don't have a lot of money, I'm not wealthy, my husband and I are uninsured (or grossly under-insured to the point where we are pretty much uninsured) and we both work two part time jobs and go to school full time. Stop taking my money and putting it to shotty use. I am tired of slaving away only for you to waste my hard earned money. Stop it! Return it!
We have a mini-lecture about this SEVERAL times during various classes and new student orientation. It costs me $96.15 per class session so why are they repeating themselves over and over? I want my money back.
We also had this thing in as part of program introduction that teaches us how to research in the library. Okay really? We're in graduate school. We probably didn't get this far by not researching. I think we all know. Those who haven't been in school for 15 or so years, well, there are very visible reference people in the library that show us how to do things and are very available to us for help. I would like my money back for that.
It's week nine of the semester, nine weeks ago summer ended. So why are we still having internet/wireless connection problems? What ever you did over the summer Techies, how could it take you more than nine weeks to fix it? I would like my Technology Fee to be returned to me also.
I'm tired of my money being wasted: the government, my apartment people, school. Really people, I don't have a lot of money, I'm not wealthy, my husband and I are uninsured (or grossly under-insured to the point where we are pretty much uninsured) and we both work two part time jobs and go to school full time. Stop taking my money and putting it to shotty use. I am tired of slaving away only for you to waste my hard earned money. Stop it! Return it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)